This is a transcript of the conversation between myself, Brandi Fleck, Host of the Human Amplified podcast, and up and coming singer-songwriter, Pattycakes and her writing partner, Boomer Roe. They tell all about turning personal poetry into music and then landing a finalist spot in the Tennessee Songwriters’ Competition.

If you’d rather listen than read, you can do that here , on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or anywhere else you get your podcasts.

Meet Dona Amelia: From Poverty to Global Leadership and Influence

Brandi Fleck:

What does being human mean to you?

Dona Amelia:

I think for me being human is actually embracing you as a whole as a well-being as a full spectrum, our strength our vulnerability our stories uh it's also meaning that you know you you build up a connection you have your purpose you have your growth it's all about you know recognizing that we're all navigating our own journey. We have our own story, but ultimately we thrive when we uplift each other. That's what it means to me, being human.

Brandi Fleck:

Beautiful. Thank you.

Everyone, we are welcoming to the show today, Dona Amelia. She is coming to us from Thailand right now, but I would love to tell you all about her.

She is a globally recognized keynote speaker, executive coach, and leadership trainer specializing in high-performance leadership, resilience, and team excellence. With over 20 years of experience, she's helped leaders and organizations worldwide elevate their leadership strategies, transform mindsets, and master high-impact communication, which I'm really excited to dig into. But also, guys, Dona is a graduate of Harvard Medical School's Executive Education Program. She's an ICF-accredited coach, a certified NLP practitioner, and she's a co-founder of EGN Singapore, Indonesia, and Malaysia, where she's built a thriving community.

EGN stands for Executives Global Network, by the way, and it's the second largest peer group network in the world for executives and Asia's largest. Beyond the boardroom, Dona is an award-winning TV host, actress, and singer known for her commanding stage presence and storytelling ability.

This is so impressive. So all of this ties together in Dona's life, and we're going to get into that, but her rich experience can also apply to your life. For example, we're going to talk about using your voice, being seen, being heard, overcoming obstacles that keep you playing small, and finding meaningful connection along the way. So, Dona, thank you for being here today, and welcome to the show.

Dona Amelia:

Wow, I feel so honored to be here. Thank you so much for having me. Thank you.

Brandi Fleck:

Yeah, I'm really excited. And, like, I love your bio and all the things you're doing in the world. What else do you want our listeners and viewers to know about you?

Dona Amelia:

Well, first of all, thank you for having me, and I would love people to know that I'm someone who believes in the power of resilience and pre-invention.

My journey, it's really ups and downs. I was born in a bamboo house full of holes, no electricity, dirt floor. Even hard to get the clean water.

But then with that adversity, I see the love from my mom and dad. They show me how is it like my path should be. And I know exactly from my early age, my life purpose is to make them happy, to bring them a better life from the poverty to have a better life. So that's my journey.

And then my dad is really the one who really guide me towards who I am now, starting by asking me to follow my heart, to follow my passion. Back then, my passion is in singing, and then he knows that, okay, this is what's going to make you having a better life, so I will support you, although I have nothing, because he was only a teacher, and the teacher salary in Indonesia was very, very, very low.

I also wanted to be a teacher, but my dad said, no, you have your own talent, and I believe in you. I believe you will be able to help many people. So believe in yourself, follow your passion, and I will be supporting you. And with that, I'm thriving because I follow my passion. I know my purpose in life. And then, yes, I really deeply value connection, especially the connection to the people around you and to everyone.

So I would love to tell everyone that I'm a person who really admire authenticity. And I think the world needs that the most.

Brandi Fleck:

Oh that is a rich story that we're gonna get into and it sounds like your parents were really instrumental in helping shape your path.

Dona Amelia:

100%, Yeah.

High-Impact Communication: How to Be Heard and Create Meaningful Impact

Brandi Fleck:

The thing that really stuck out to me when I was learning about you was the phrase “high impact communication,” so what does that mean?

Dona Amelia:

I think high-impact communication is not only about speaking. It's about how you make people hear. It's all about being in clarity, in authenticity, and then also, most importantly, is the connection. It's not about just talk, talk, talk, talk, but how you make them feel, and also what impact did you give to that person.

Ultimately you wanted to influence them in the nice way in the subtle way so then they can take some action right it regardless if it is in a keynote or let's say you speak in the big stages or leading company leading your team leading yourself or when you have one-on-one i think is the way you say it, the way how you make people feel when talking to you, when you give them the full trust, the full empathy, the full you. Basically, you're being present there at the moment. That is what I feel like making the high-impact communication. It's your energy. It's also your ability to be able to read and engage the people around you. And the key is to actively listening. Listen not only with your image, but also with your eyes, with your presence, with everything on you. That's what makes the high-impact communication, in my opinion.

Brandi Fleck:

Ooh, okay. And it builds connection, I guess, through, I'm thinking empathy. I'm thinking like you're displaying empathy, you're being fully present.

Dona Amelia:

Yes.

Brandi Fleck:

How does being fully present make someone feel?

Dona Amelia:

Amazing. They feel honored. They feel loved. And they can feel that we are there for them. They will feel that we respect them. We give everything to them at that point of time. And I think that's very, very important.

From Rejection to Resilience: Dona Amelia's Transformational Life Story

Brandi Fleck:

Absolutely. The respect. I'm really glad that you brought that up because that's really important.

So let's go back to your beginnings though because I'm sure it was a journey to go from, poverty and where you were as a child to where you are today and I know you alluded to that a little bit, but what was that journey like what were some specific I guess highlights of that journey.

Dona Amelia:

Yes, I guess all my success, my journey, I really need to thank all the people around me because without them, without their blessing and support, I will not be who I am now. But tremendous thanks and love to my parents, especially because, especially my dad, who really shaped who I am now.

So basically, when they had me, they just graduated from university. My dad about to be a teacher, my mom just graduated from university. They fall in love, and they don't even have money to buy me milk. So I don't like milk until now because I drink a starchy liquid of rice. Because in Indonesia, people are eating rice, right? So when it's not yet well done, that's what's the white starchy liquid. That's what I drink normally.

So with that, you know, but they have the love for me, and they have the belief in me. And I see also my parents, you know, my dad going to teach and then my mom, you know, selling fishball in the market. And also back then, I know that, oh, so first of all, right, in that era, male is the one who always worked and all. But then I see my mom, oh, my mom also worked. Then I know, as a woman, we can also contribute to the family. As a woman, we can also work hard to help the family. So that's the first thing.

And then, yes, as mentioned, that's what I know exactly what I want in life. So I really wanted to make them happy, basically.

And thanks God, when I was in the senior high school, my dad found my talent when I sing in one of our family's wedding. But since then, my dad know, OK, this is your talent. This is the gift from God. So you have to follow this now.

Since 15 years old, I was singing and studying all the time.

And I still remember one time, one day my dad was driving his old motorbike in the pouring rain and all, just because he heard that in our neighborhood there is filming for a movie or something like that. And then he's like really excited, bringing my photograph, giving to the producer and telling him that, oh hey I have a daughter she is valentine would you like to do the casting to her and then guess what—he gets kicked out immediately like why you get away don't bother us blah blah blah.

But he's not giving up and that's what also when I learned oh okay rejection is okay. My dad told me that it's okay, it's just not the time, but don't give up, let's do other things.

So I was already doing the competition on TV and so on. And I was living in really a rural area. And of course, I do have the imposter syndrome when I have this competition against many beautiful, young, talented women or girls in Indonesia.

But then again, my dad is the one who always gets me strong. He said to me one thing, Dona, you know what? Every human being—back then his knowledge is Indonesia, right? And then he said, everyone still eats rice, Dona. Nobody eats diamond. It's the same. You and them are the same.

Don't have this imposter syndrome. It's okay. Believe in yourself. Believe in your talent. And that's very, very profound.

And also, I think my whole life is all about, you know, having this beautiful advice from my parents, also from my grandma, because I also lived with my grandma when I was a child.

So I still remember my grandma told me this, Donna, if you play with your friend, and then you see another friend eating chocolate or candy and you want it. You know what? Don't ask them. Go back to grandma and if I have money, I will give it to you. But if I don't have it, don't be sad.

Instead, you need to give, always give to other friends, to other people. I said when I was maybe, I don't know, five or something. I said, and then my grandma smiled and said, you can always give your kindness and your beautiful smile to everybody. Because regardless if you have money or not, you will always have your kindness and your smile. And you can always make people happy with your smile. Also, since then, I know exactly what I want is to make people happy through whatever I do in life. So that's why now when I was, you know, growing up, I understand.

That's why I love when I sing. I love singing. I love doing TV presenting. I love being actress and so on. DJing, coaching, now leading company. I still the same. I love to make people happy. I love to contribute to others. And that was, you know, like the advice from my grandma, actually. So I remember that, like, wow, that's amazing. Of course, life is not always easy. For example, during my university degree, I'm really juggling between singing and studying, singing and studying, singing and studying. All the money I have, I give it to my parents. From the beginning, I give them a stove, preach, whatever it is they need in their household to the point that I can already, during my university.

Bought them a car, a house, bring them to Hajj because we are Muslim in Indonesia. You know, bring parents to Hajj is something that's very, very important. So, yeah, and it's not easy because, you know, I might lose the timing when, you know, having friends going to cinema or something like that. No my life is not like that. It's all about um work and studying work and studying work and studying.

But then you know that's that's make me understand the power of you know resilience.

When you know you're not star my not started very clear I want to make my parents happy bring them from the property to have a better life.

The D.O.N.A. Framework: Dreams, Opportunity, Never Give Up, Action

Then I want to make people happy everybody around me happy so whatever it is the juggle and so on I'm okay with that to the point that I developed this framework that I think it's really the one that lead me to who I am now is the D-O-N-A framework, which is my name. It stands for dreams, opportunity, never give up, and action.

Dreams

Because when you have nothing like me, yes, you only have dreams. I dreamed to travel the world when I was a child. I dreamed to have a chocolate. I dreamed to make my parents happy. I dreamed to have this. That's the only thing I have.

But from there, it's like your North Star, you're guiding your life mission. But then dream is only a dream if you didn't do something about it.

Opportunity

So then the next step is to seize the opportunity. To all stand for opportunity. You need to find the opportunity. Me and my dad keep singing and singing here and there, finding the opportunity for me to have more exposure and all, to the point that, of course, the producer found me. And then in 2007, then I made my own album and so on.

And then I spread my wing to do the TV presenting, acting, and so on. If I do 10 casting and I get one role, that's already good. To the point that when I was doing the TV presenting, one of my TV programs won eight-time Panasonic Cobel Awards. But the filming is from 12 a.m. until 3 a.m. every single night. And it's on air at 11 a.m. So it is not easy. And then I do have a few years of movie series daily on TV at 6 p.m., but the filming is one day before, like almost 24 hours.

However, again, you know, like this is, if you know, again, you're North Star, why you're doing that, it's not that hard because you know your purpose is greater than yourself. The purpose is really bigger than all the struggle because you know what is your end goal. So, yes, seizing the opportunity and don't give up.

Never Give Up

That's the next step is never give up because, of course, nothing is easy, ups and downs, let alone in Indonesia, the competition is fierce, yeah, because we have, back then, 250 million people. And then, of course, the only thing I have, I don't have any basic, let's say, going to the school of act or singing school and so on.

The only thing I have is a talent and support from my parents.

So, of course, so many other girls wanted to be in my position. If I made a mistake or something because I do so many live TV presenting, right? Like zero mistake and so on. But again, you know, don't give up. Whatever it is, don't give up.

Action

And most importantly, once you're done with your dreams and then you seize the opportunity and you don't give up, N, A, stand for action. So when you get that opportunity, you need to do the action 200%. For me, that's compulsory. Because if you just do so-so, Then you're just going to be so-so. You will not reach where you are.

You need to do it 200%. As mentioned, I only have talent, so I need to really work hard more than everyone else who has maybe more opportunity or more privilege than me.

So that's what my principle in life. Until now, whenever I'm doing something new, whenever I'm feeling down and all, I say to myself, like, hey, Dona, remember your framework, the D-O-N-A, dream, opportunity, never give up, action.

Where are you in that stage? You know, I know it's hard Dona, but you've been you've been doing this for years and years and it's proven that you know you can uh you know like overcome any obstacle with that.

So I'm glad that I can have this framework for myself and I also mentioned this also to many many um like young generation or people that um inviting me for speaking and all and I'm glad that this framework can also help others.

How to Shift from Scarcity to Abundance: A Mindset for Empowered Living

Brandi Fleck:

Yeah, absolutely. And so something that really stood out to me that you said, well, a lot of it stood out, but that rejection is okay. And I want to just make sure I mentioned that.

I wasn't planning on asking you this, but how do you deal with feelings of lack versus feelings of abundance.

Dona Amelia:

So back then when I was younger, of course, my knowledge about knowing myself is less than now, probably, right?

Of course, you feel sad. You feel imposter syndrome when you feel lacking. I mean, if you are in my position and all. There is so many times when you doubt yourself and all. You just keep going just because you know you're North Star to make your parents happy, to give them a better life, to make other people happy. But you forgot about yourself. I've been there completely. So my life is all about achieving something, achieving something, achieve, achieve, achieve, achieve. But actually, I feel hollow in myself, to be honest.

Although I'm in the big stages, for example, being a DJ, travel the world, or singing, I travel the world. But then, yes, it feels like a bit hollow in yourself because it's the lacking of something, right?

When you feel abundance nowadays, when I know myself more and all, of course, it's different. Like, you have the compassion to yourself and to others. So I still am the same Dona, but now the Dona that I am now, knowing me more and also didn't neglect what I need. And that's when I feel abundance because my own self is already content.

I didn't feel like, oh, I don't have the wealth or the money that other people have.

Instead, I feel like I'm so grateful that that person has this and this. Hope they can you know make the best of it, can help other people with it, and I don't have the feeling of jealousy and so on.

But back then of course I'm jealous, like, why sometimes I need to work so hard where someone else just, you know, like, do something kind of, let's say, flirt and all, and then they get the role. Well, I need to do the casting 10 times and so on. But again, I was young. I feel like, you know, I didn't know myself as much as I do myself now. So I'm lacking the feeling of abundance.

Now I feel complete and content of who I am.

I have nothing to prove, but everything to improve.

And yeah, I just want to make the world a better place through whatever I do. If I'm being a speaker now, if my story can resonate with people, I'm very, very happy.

And then, yeah, I feel really full of abundance in my life because most importantly, and thanks God, I still feel this from the beginning until now, I think until forever, is being grateful. I'm very grateful for every single thing that's happened in my life. Regardless, it's ups and downs, I'm grateful. And that's what I feel.

When you feel abundant, you will feel grateful and you feel whole and content.

Brandi Fleck:

Yeah. Okay. Okay, so I'm hearing you say that when you start to take yourself into consideration too, that helps you feel more abundant.

[23:52] What was the shift that helped you start taking yourself into consideration?

Dona Amelia:

[24:00] Well, actually, it's a very long journey, to be honest with you.

I am kind of a pleaser person. I love making people happy, right?

So with that, sometimes you neglect your own needs. And that's, I think, something that maybe some of the people around there also have, basically. So we wanted to make everyone happy, but then you neglect your own happiness.

As simple as, you know, really, is it really make you happy?

Let's say for me back then, it's really, really wanted to achieve, achieve, achieve. So then I can make money. So then the money I have, I give to my parents. So it's always like having more and more and more and more and more.

I mean, back then I feel like nothing wrong with that. I do it. I work hard because I know it's a good cause, right? Yes, it is correct. However, am I happy with that? Am I really happy with the work that I do, where I need to always be 48 kilograms? I cannot be more than that because TV makes you bigger, about 5 kilos bigger.

So what I do back then, instead of exercise, I took diet pill, you know, I starved myself and all. And then yeah being in the area where people you know like really judging you by what bags—what the brand of your bags or your shoes or your clothes and all—is that the one that really makes you happy you know? That is the one that you know back then I don't really care much i know it is affecting me but I just feel like you know try to put it away from me because I know my North Star, is one way is good but then I…

Lately, I think not so long ago, I think a few years ago, when I turned myself to become an entrepreneur, when I go abroad for about 10 years back, and then being an entrepreneur, it's still the same. I love to make people happy. I love to serve people in my organization and all. And then the turning point was when I joined as a coach, you know, because as a coach, you need to really coach yourself in order for you to help others.

And I think that was the turning point because then only then I realized that you know what Dona you neglect your own self like you you know you are really also unhappy about the circumstances in the in the kind of celebrity or showbiz life, but you just you know try to cover your eyes. You make your eyes blind because your purpose is greater than that. Again, nothing wrong with that back then, right?

But now I think it's the time to listen that, hey, Dona is tired actually with that. Dona is actually unhappy with that. But I am unable to talk only up to the point when I'm becoming a coach and I coach myself. I mean, people around me, all the other coaches also help me. It's like peeling the onion of myself. That is when I know that, oh, wow. Yes, it's actually much nicer when you know yourself, when you're still aiming to reach your purpose and all without neglecting your own needs.

So, for example, instead of keep myself being in that circumstances in the showbiz when the competition is fierce and, you know, those kind of glamorous but sometimes fake when I need to be 48 all the time and so on. I think I can still contribute to the world and still achieving my purpose doing something else.

So, for example, now I'm leading the Asia's largest peer network in the world where I can serve the leaders to be better leaders because they can come together in the same environment. They discuss about their challenges, helping each other. I'm happy. And that's what, you know, contentment.

And then I feel like, wow, it doesn't have to be in the showbiz because all my life since 15 years old, only knowing the showbiz, now it's different. I can serve people in a different way.

And then yes by being a coach my god has tremendous help to me and to others because you know me I don't know who do not right what I know is what I want only for the vision and purpose but I didn't know who really I am, now I know who I am.

So with that, I feel like okay, I would love my story to be heard, I would like to you know, mention to people how important it is to know yourself and to listen to yourself and to be happy and content as who you really are and be authentic be the real you basically and that's very important and I think that's what is my calling now, to be the speaker, to really spread the message, to help others, lead other people, and yeah, inspire others.

Reframing Rejection: How to Keep Going When You Feel Like Giving Up

Brandi Fleck:

Awesome. To help people be themselves. Yeah. Authentic selves. Yeah. Okay. Well, now this brings me back to the topic of rejection.

Because it's almost like people can go through this phase of rejecting themselves when they try to please others but at the same time when you're putting yourself out there and you're going for what you want in life you will face rejection from others so just what are your thoughts on rejection and being able to put yourself out there?

Dona Amelia:

I think just seeing my whole life rejection is a friend.

I think realistically, we need to understand that failure is also something that, you know, can come regardless how successful you are. I guess the more successful you are, the more failure you also might get. So I think fear of rejection is normal. Yeah. And then having imposter syndrome, that's also very normal and it's okay to feel that way, and it's okay to feel the fear, that's fine, but then what do you want to do about it?

So for me I think it's very important to have, self-belief that you know being rejected it's fine, it's just not now.

That's the most important things, for example, for me I've been rejected for the casting for 10 times i got one it's okay so during the casting one two three so it's just not the right time the right moment, but then you keep going that's that's why I said to me having that framework of dream, opportunity, never give up, action—is very important the D.O.N.A. framework because that's what keeps me going when I get rejected.

So I keep on doing and never give up and keep finding another opportunity because if I get rejected one, so this opportunity is not for me yet, I found another opportunity. And then just keep going like that again and again and again and again. I get rejected, I found another opportunity. I get rejected, I found another opportunity and never give up. Until when you get that opportunity, as mentioned, the action needs to be 200%. Because then that is when you really do what you have to do to really establish yourself, to really do well in what you do.

That's what I think my view about rejection. I feel it a lot.

Brandi Fleck:

I gotcha, and it's interesting because your framework sort of it relies on abundance—that abundance mindset—because to be able to keep going over and over and over you have to know that another opportunity is out there—there are so many opportunities available. Just the rejection of one is not the end of the world.

Dona Amelia:

One thousand percent, yes.

Brandi Fleck:

Yeah. And I think a lot of people keep themselves small because they're afraid of rejection and they don't allow themselves to be seen. They don't allow themselves to be heard, because they fear that the pain of that rejection is going to be more than not. I don't actually know how to say it. They just fear the pain of that rejection. So I think it feels safer for a lot of people to play it small. Why do you think that is?

Dona Amelia:

I think indeed you know uh not everyone willing to get out there you know out of their comfort zone, and yes probably yeah most of the many of the woman leaders for example women in general, not all of course right, often always wanted to be in the comfort zone because when you are out there, when you are stepping to the unknown, or the non-comfort zone and all, they have a lot of fear. That's why they play small. I think it's the fea—fear of failure, fear of judgment, fear of standing out—that's what holding them back.

But again, I guess when you have that fear actually it's a good sign because you are like in the age of stepping into your growth, that's for sure. So I think I understand when people always put them small and all, but probably if you can think about it if you always be in your safe space and in your comfort zone then you not grow, but if that's your choice that's also okay if that's your choice. But if you want to grow you need to understand that you know that feeling is normal.

And you can utilize that feeling as the energy that gives you a fuel to move further instead of making you smaller and smaller and smaller. Make it like the feeling of, okay, I'm scared of failure now. I'm scared to be seen. I'm scared of judgment and all. But then you need to understand that when I feel that way, meaning I do something. I do something better. I do something bigger. I'm not stuck where I am now, and I want to grow. And this is the feeling of stepping up. So use that.

I mean, change your mindset instead of making you scared of it. Just understand that this is the feeling when I want to grow. When I will be one step ahead, this is how I'm going to feel. And that's okay to feel afraid and all.

Using Your Voice to Inspire Change: Speaking Up with Courage and Purpose

Brand Fleck:

Okay. And how would you suggest dealing with the fear? And I'm asking this question from the context of, especially in the U.S. Right now, there's a lot of political turmoil. And I think that some people are being censored. People are going, as time goes on, they're going to be afraid to speak up. But there's like this, there's this meme or this quote that's been going around for a long time that's like, “speak, even though your voice shakes.” And it's sort of like, well, do it even though you're afraid. And I think that sometimes it's more dangerous to not speak up, even if it feels more dangerous to speak up, if that makes sense.

So just what are your thoughts of dealing with that fear, and putting yourself out there, and using your voice in a scary external climate.

Dona Amelia:

Right. I can understand where you're coming from. I mean, when speaking up, becoming a risk, of course, you know, you need to also think about the consequences and also it's quite delicate balance, I would say. Right. But then, of course, the question is, what is the cost of being silent? Right. So to me, I always think of what is my purpose?

What's the purpose of I am speaking up? Is it greater than myself?

Is it for me to, you know, really spread up the values that I believe in? Then it's worth of discomfort, of course.

But again, I think most important, you need to have what we call a strategic communication, which is when you know your audience.

And then again, how you say it, when, and then what's the impact that you're going to give.

That's very important because sometimes the loudest doesn't mean the most effective way, right?

Sometimes it's all about influence.

Not only like you talk super loud and all, but you don't give any influence to others, don't give the effect to others, not making people do some action and all, but the core I think it's it's important that we understand what is our purpose when we speak up right and think about how to say it, when to say it, what's the impact.

So that is very important to have this strategic communication, especially when you are in the kind of risky situation.

But ultimately, it's very important that our purpose is greater than our fear about this.

Brandi Fleck:

Those are all really good points. Do you have any tangible steps someone would take to create a strategy?

Steps for Strategic Communication

So first of all, I think very important to start very small. Yeah.

And again, if you're afraid or anything, I think being as human as possible, that's the most important one.

So start small and be as human as possible, meaning that show up as authentic as possible.

And being vulnerable is very important. Being vulnerable—it's allowing people to see who you really are. It's okay to ask help. It's okay to say that I'm uncomfortable. It's okay to speak up. It's okay to have the communication that make you uncomfortable. And that's where you know you will feel like when you are open up, other people will open up to you as well, so I think those are the three things very important strategies: so start small, be as human as possible, and then be authentic and be vulnerable.

That's how I think the effective communication will effectively happen when you're starting.

Brandi Fleck:

Awesome, thank you for that. And guys, all of that will be in the show notes. So be sure to go check those out if you haven't been taking notes because that's really good advice.

Authentic Connection Through Vulnerability, Storytelling, and Leadership

Brandi Fleck:

And then let's pivot a little bit into connection because I feel like it's all related. When you're being vulnerable, when you're being as human as possible, you're going to connect with other people if they can sort of meet you and do the same. So how is voice and human connection connected?

Dona Amelia:

I think voice is a very super good tool, I guess, for us to be able to connect, right? And connection as a human being is everything. Because without connection, you feel empty inside and outside as well.

It's very, very fundamental for you to be able to use your voice, use your communication to be able to connect with people because it gives us meaning, resilience, and support. Without connection you are empty basically so and I've seen it in my whole life when I perform on stage for example or when I build a business, when I’m coaching leaders, the moment that truly matters are always about people connection.

If you don't connect with people, then whatever you say is not going to give the impact, so again back to my previous point I think being present, having the authenticity, having the empathy, having respect, being there for the other person through your communication—that's how you connect, and that's how why the connection is very important because then you're gonna build something that is a very much close to each other and really have a meaningful and impactful relationship and it's very very important.

Brandi Fleck:

Okay I love how you said that voice is a tool for connection.

[41:35] Are there any other tools for connection?

Dona Amelia:

[41:40] Yes, I think back again to the being authentic, I think that's very important and also being vulnerable. And for me, I think story.

Sharing stories always, to me, it always works to build the connection.

Because especially, let's say during networking or you met a new person and all, people are tired of only something, to talk something very shallow or very much in the service like who are you what you do and so on right they might not even remember you, but when you tell a story then you will remember.

For example, maybe you know when you when you come to the networking events and all then you talk about the story, but for me like I love to talk this tell the story about my dad or my grandma, yeah and then they remember oh you are the girls who are da-da-da-da-da-da-da. So that's, I think, also very important to also sharing stories instead of only talking very on the surface.

Brandi Fleck:

Yeah, that's a good point. And so if I could maybe summarize a little bit what I'm hearing you say is that to build a connection with another person, you have to reach out. You sort of have to be vulnerable. You have to tell them about yourself, share stories. And that can feel scary too, just on a smaller level, on a micro level.

[43:12] But it's okay. It's okay to do that. And if that person ends up rejecting you or judging you, there are other opportunities to connect with other people.

Dona Amelia:

Yes, absolutely. Go back to find another opportunity. And don't give up. Never give up, again and again and again. If this person is not really serving you well at that point of time, that's okay.

Then find another opportunity in the other place, right? and with the other person, for example.

So really, to me, I really love this D-O-N-A framework because that's in me going. Let's put it that way. It's pushing me in the kind of right direction, make me, what is it, stronger in a very good way, make me more resilient and all because with the finding opportunity itself and the never give up, it, I mean, gives me the chance to understand that, hey, failures is your friend.

Rejection is also your friend. And that's okay. That's normal. It's okay.

Transferring Skills and Reinventing Yourself in a New Chapter of Life

So one more story I would like to share with you. As mentioned, I always have dreams. So when I was in the senior high school, I dreamed to travel the world, right? When I was starting singing on the 15-year-old Dona, living in the middle of nowhere, you know, in the small little village. But I already have a dream. Wow, if only I can travel the world. if only I can live overseas and becoming successful and so on. And then I got that opportunity basically 10 years back, right? After I quite established in my career in Indonesia. As mentioned, I won eight-time Panasonic Gobe Awards. I see myself on TV every single day and so on. And then I got the opportunity to move to Vietnam. And I said, wow, this is it. You know, I wanted to get it. This is my opportunity now. So I moved to Ho Chi Minh City. I thought I can still be a TV presenter and a singer and also an actress. And guess what?

I failed 100%.

The reason is because I cannot speak the language. Very hard, the language. But then it's important for you to understand. Again, find the other opportunity. And I think, okay, if I can't speak here, what can I still do? Oh, I still can sing. So back then, I already made the collaboration with Miss Universe Vietnam. She is beautiful. She's a DJ also. And then, yeah, I think in the big, big stages with big DJs across the globe in Vietnam, because that's what I can do, right? I can still sing. But then I also, Fifi, why am I also not learning how to DJ? But then I can DJ and I can sing. So that's what I do.

So that's when I started my career, the starting point when I became a DJ.

But then, back then also, I've been introduced to this company, Executive Global Network. And I fall in love with the idea of leaders come together, helping each other, discussing their challenges, and making each other better. And I love the humbleness of the people there that, oh, wow, they are CEOs, yet they still want to learn from each other.

[46:30] They love to help each other, and I fall in love with that concept. And I learned also to feed myself towards the corporate world. And guess what? I have no idea about how to make Excel or Word document or PPT. My God, I'm not joking.

But then what I do? Same. I found the opportunity to talk to my colleague. I said, I have no idea about this, dear. I swear.

I know how to talk to people. I know how to, you know, make people happy. I can really, you know, like be on stage and all, but these things, I have no idea. You see, by being vulnerable, being authentic, and that's going to help. Then my colleague helped me. And then most importantly, you're leaning on your strength instead of thinking about like your weaknesses it's not going to help yes you of course wanted to improve in your weaknesses right but do not make it like you know drag you down but just understand ah i have this weakness i need to improve but then focus on your strength so what i do my strength is with people i can i love to talk to people i love meeting new people i love making people happy so in my organization i'm managing one almost 150 meetings and events for this senior executive per year and that's my expertise because i've been on tv all the time so i know how to create great events and all right for these um kind-hearted leaders to come together they discuss about their challenges because they're most of the time lonely at the top they might unable to talk about their challenges in their own organization yet they they also have a lot of things in their shoulders right they might not able to speak up in their own organization because maybe confidentiality or hierarchy, but they need a platform like EGN, for example.

A safe space for them to be really themselves, to talk about their challenges and get help from each other. Because in our organization, we gather the senior executives to come together within the similar seniority.

The reason is because, one, they can relate to each other, right? But because if I match CEO and let's say middle management, their challenges just might different but if let's say I gather CEO with the CEO from different industry no competitor they can talk freely and they can talk I mean they can help each other.

So that's also beautiful. That's why I'm very grateful to be able to serve these people. So my point is that, you know, it's okay to fail, but it's okay to be vulnerable, and it's okay to be authentic. Actually, all those things are very, very important. To be as human as possible, to make you connect with yourself and with others as well. And that's important. Yeah, that's what I want to say.

Brandi Fleck:

Wonderful. Okay. I really love how you transferred skills from a completely different career into a space that on the surface might not seem like there would be overlapping skills. But I feel like that's really inspirational for someone who wants to make a big change in their life. Like it's possible.

Dona Amelia:

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Believe in yourself. Believe in your talent. And as mentioned, just enhance on your strength. Believe in your strength and that's what you need to lean on. Of course, at the same time, you want to improve something that you still need to have an improvement and a place of growth. But at the same time, still leaning on your strength. That's what I do.

Final Thoughts: Trust the Journey, Embrace Your Voice, and Uplift Others

Brandi Fleck:

Gotcha. Okay, Dona, before we tell everyone how they can find you, Is there anything that you want to share that we haven't talked about yet today?

Dona Amelia:

I guess my whole message is actually about loving yourself. Start with the dreams. Dreams meaning you have a vision, you have a goal, clear goal for your life. Doesn't matter big or small, regardless.

And then once you have those goals, once you have the vision and mission, try to find the opportunity for you to reach that dream to reach that goal, to make your purpose coming true and along the way it's not going to be easy it's okay don't give up friends make the failure or the rejection as your friends and when you get that opportunity do it 200 i guess that's the summary of what i want to say because with that you will have this resilient and you will be thriving for success.

Brandi Fleck:

Beautiful. Well, Dona, how can our listeners and viewers find you and the work you're doing in the world?

Dona Amelia:

Thank you. So you can find me on LinkedIn. I'm very active on LinkedIn. My LinkedIn is Dona Amelia, D-O-N-A space, A-M-E-L-I-A. And my Instagram and also my Facebook at Miss Dona Amelia, M-I-S-S-D-O-N-A, A-M-E-L-I-A. So you can always find me on those three social media.

Brandi Fleck:

Wonderful. And again, all of those links will be in the show notes. So go check those out. And Dona, thank you so much for coming on the show and sharing with us a little bit of your life and journey.

Dona Amelia:

Thank you for having me, dear. Very, very grateful and honored to be here. Thank you.